Why Conflict is Good for You
A Process of Thesis, Antithesis and Synthesis
We live in a world abounding with differences in culture, language, philosophy, and lifestyle. For the most part, we celebrate those differences. Other times, they challenge our way of life. From our long history of world wars down to our one-on-one relationships and even the conflicts within ourselves, lifestyle clashes are present everywhere, and choosing the right response is incredibly tough.
They say you dwell in what you dwell on, so rather than getting stuck whenever we feel pulled in two directions, let’s ask ourselves, what is the purpose of conflict? Could God have designed a world with so much contrast, as a way to help us? Do our inner and outer conflicts serve a purpose toward our happiness?
Built to Rebuild
Father Moon teaches that God’s creation involves a process called “origin-division-union action.” He explains that God is a being of dualities—masculine and feminine, silence and sound, youth and maturity, and so on. To fully explore the vastness of these types of contrasting yet harmonious aspects of God’s essence, God chose to manifest them outwardly into different individual creations, especially into our unique entities as people. Just like an artist channeling a specific emotion into a piece of art as a means of introspection or catharsis, God sought to find personal meaning through creation.
Where do we fit in?
If that is the case, where do we fit in? Consider this: do we experience deeper satisfaction when we breeze easily through a task, or when we work hard, struggle, fail a couple of times, and then succeed? Perhaps God’s infinitely parental heart knew that we would have a richer and more fulfilling experience here on earth if we came into it incomplete, with something still to learn and gain. If so, then maybe our lives were intended all along by God to be spent in search of what makes us whole: each other. Hence, God (the Origin) would purposefully create us into divergent dualities (Division) in hopes that we learn from each other and become harmonized (Union), thus returning to full resemblance with God. Origin-division-union action is a way to take contrasting aspects of our nature to build and rebuild ourselves, over and over again, in order to keep growing, keep learning, keep pursuing our full potential, and out of that process, become co-creators with God.
Father Moon isn’t alone in his fascination; this dynamic of intentional division with an end goal of union has been explored by other big thinkers too. Most notably by philosopher Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel. His Dialectic, expressed in components called Thesis, Antithesis, and Synthesis, has been used as an essential framework for critical reasoning, art, and storytelling, and underscores how conflict and resolution are notions that capture the attention of many.
With this fresh spin in mind, think about some of the things you tend to struggle with. Perhaps you have a friend whose faith or life philosophy clashes with yours, or perhaps you believe strongly in two ideas that seem completely incongruous. In viewing them more as two parts of a whole instead of two opposing forces battling for superiority, do they still seem as incompatible as before? Or might their presence in your life be an opportunity to grow closer in mutual respect and love? The harder the conflict is to surmount, the greater the reward for surmounting it.
Are there any seemingly conflicting beliefs, thoughts, or ideas that you think might actually harmonize? Here are some of ours:
Planning our own dreams versus trusting in God’s plan
Supporting our families versus investing in personal growth
Keeping things simple versus living a bold, epic life
Self-care versus service
Perfectionism versus loving our flaws
Being assertive versus being embracing
Competition versus collaboration
Being strong versus being sensitive